A True Sorry

Most people who are decent, say sorry when they mess up on commitments and relationships. Others don't bother at all, so I guess these are the indecent ones. How many sorries have you heard and have uttered in your life time (till now)? Too many. We would have lost count. Can't remember. Or can't be bothered to count.

Sometimes, sorry is just a convenient way to get out of a tight spot. It's as if saying sorry would make everything alright. It becomes a magic quick fix word, a band-aid for every wound. But is that a true sorry?

I've said lots of sorries. I was truly sorry most times. Sometimes I wouldn't - pride chained my heart and glued my lips.

A true sorry comes with a confession, an admission of one's specific failure towards the other person. It's a profoundly humbling (and potentially humiliating if perceived wrongly) passage, like a ship sailing a passageway precariously near jagged rocks. Any sudden wind shifts or tidal changes might dash the ship upon the rocks. It's a total vulnerability.

A true sorry brings with it a changed future. It's a future of changed behaviour, a correction from past misbehaviours and actions. So, a true sorry goes beyond mere talk. As they say, talk is cheap. But talk is highly prized when it's backed up with the walk. A true sorry has a high price, the price of action.

A true sorry does not merely mend the relationship. It changes the "sorry" person! What ultimately happens is that the person is being refined in his or her moral fibre, almost like a refining process for removing dross from the molten gold. A true sorry makes that person better, not worse.

"Bear fruits in keeping with repentance." - John the Baptiser